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Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/4/2018 5:54:24 AM

Tannic Monster

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I was planning to attend a dinner at a restaurant with some friends and some I had not met. The stakes were pretty high with people declaring bottles mostly north of the $200 range. That should sound pretty exciting to a serious wine lover like me. My wife was to be out of town but I was planning to attend anyway. I love the opportunity to savor a world-class wine at a nice dinner...to experience it as it evolves over a few hours...to hopefully fall in love with it and have a memorable experience. As the date approached I asked my friend and host how many of us there would be in the final tally. He replied "eleven" including me. At that point I decided not to attend. The reason: I just don't see how eleven people can share a great bottle of wine. At best it would be a disorganized wine tasting event...but it couldn't even be that. With parties that size you might as well have two tables because one end is not communicating with the other end. I prefer a table of six and perhaps eight at the most. I realize that I may be over analyzing here, but I lost all interest after I learned of the number in our party. Am I being unreasonable? Anyone agree with me?

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/4/2018 6:32:22 AM

Franklin 10

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I have the same response as you.

Fine dining with fine wines is one of life’s great pleasures and is mutually enriched among appreciators. For a sit-down meal, unless the attendees have some other connection as a reason to gather, the social aspect of a gathering of more than 6 increasingly dominates the experience.

I’m all for social gatherings large and small but for super fine wines, the type you describe for this meal, I’d have the same concerns.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/4/2018 6:44:18 AM

Ibetian

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As with so many things related to wine, to each his own, and it’s too bad you went from enthusiastic to disinterested, but I think 11 is fine. My wife and I routinely host dinner parties with multiple wines for both small (4-8) and large groups of 12-26. The dynamics are indeed different for larger groups; you can’t have a deep conversation with every person, two tables are needed, etc. And with a dozen or more we will usually serve a sparkler, one or two whites, 2-4 reds, and maybe a Sweetie to finish. We’ll have multiple bottles of each wine, so folks can take a taste and then drink what they like best. So these are dinners with wine more than wine tasting dinners, but still guests can experience 3-8 wines.

For 11, each person would get about a half a glass of a given bottle. That’s an ample tasting portion, but doesn’t allow the opportunity for savoring a full glass over dinner. At the Tampa Spring Break off lines the excellent organizers (I hope we will have another this year!) had each couple bring two of the same wines, so though we had more than 11 each person could try each wine. That worked out well, and combined with sparklers to start there was plenty for everyone.

I agree with you that a dinner for 6 Allows for a shared conversation as well as contemplation of wines. But higher numbers can be just as much fun, I think, just in a different way. Best wishes.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/4/2018 6:47:43 AM

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My rule is any dinner with more than 12 attending requires 2x per wine.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/4/2018 6:56:02 AM

dbg

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I'm with you, TM.
I used to be fine with large groups. Now I mostly avoid them, with occasional exceptions.
They're OK for tasting/learning, but small pours and limited time with each wine are problems.
And the social interactions are more difficult in large groups.

The ideal number for a wine dinner and drinking some nice bottles is 4-6 people.
Maximum is 8. Even at 8, it's only 3 oz per person for each wine. May not be enough to revisit over time.
More than 8, I look at it as a tasting, not a drinking event.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/4/2018 7:04:30 AM

CranBurgundy

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It's all good to me, and one could counter with the old phrase "the more, the merrier". My wife and I have been part of 6-8 person groups on a regular basis in both Connecticut and Central Florida and enjoyed them as the entire table can be involved in the conversation or smaller 2 - 3 person chats often break off temporarily. We've also been part of a local NJ club that could be anywhere from 10 to 40 people on any given Monday, and found that fun too. There's nothing wrong with moving around the table before or after dinner to talk to everyone.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/4/2018 8:14:15 AM

champagneinhand

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I’ve done 11, just two weeks ago. I know that some don’t prefer certain wines, like my wife and most reds. With 10 per bottle you get a decent half glass. I always bring my own stems so I can follow a wine as long as I want, rather than having one or two glasses from the restaurant, it not uncommon to see me with 6 different glasses to enjoy the wines over time.

Glasses like Gabriel Glos come in handy for this or Spiegelay Chardonnay 6 packs as the can double as small serving Bordeaux glasses. Usually I bring both. GG make better small serving Burgundy glasses.

But it’s totally your decision. I figure the more exposure to better wines is always a good thing. Sure in an ideal world I would rather split a bottle with only 4 people. But with 11 great wines, why not. I’m sure you have a spare bottle that you have a second to enjoy in a smaller situation.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/4/2018 8:47:14 AM

Scott W

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quote:

ORIGINAL: champagneinhand

I’ve done 11, just two weeks ago. I know that some don’t prefer certain wines, like my wife and most reds. With 10 per bottle you get a decent half glass. I always bring my own stems so I can follow a wine as long as I want, rather than having one or two glasses from the restaurant, it not uncommon to see me with 6 different glasses to enjoy the wines over time.

Glasses like Gabriel Glos come in handy for this or Spiegelay Chardonnay 6 packs as the can double as small serving Bordeaux glasses. Usually I bring both. GG make better small serving Burgundy glasses.

But it’s totally your decision. I figure the more exposure to better wines is always a good thing. Sure in an ideal world I would rather split a bottle with only 4 people. But with 11 great wines, why not. I’m sure you have a spare bottle that you have a second to enjoy in a smaller situation.

I agree, in my two main tasting groups we have 8 to 10 people at 1 bottle per person. We seem to have more than enough time to taste through the wines and discuss, usually have to take some home. And yes bring your own stems.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/4/2018 9:11:39 AM

mye

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Personally if I can have the chance to hang out with “some friends”, I would do it Regardless of wine setup. The fact there are great food and great wine is a excellent bonus. I’m happy with 2 good friends or 10 ppl who are a mix. Different dynamic but always a good time.

Is 11 a lot? For fine dining sure it is. But if it’s friends and friends of friends, hanging out. Having good food and wine? How bad can it be?
So I get one pour of 2oz of a wine instead of 2-3 pours and following over the night.
I guess if I prioritize the friends/social aspect ahead of it being a “food/wine” event, I would attend.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/4/2018 9:25:31 AM

desertwine

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We are serious foodies to the point of publishing a cookbook that we mostly cook by. We actually prefer to stay in unless there is a special reason to go out. When we do go out, it is either 2 or 4 or up to 10+ in local restaurants that know us well.. That said, with a large home kitchen set up with 8 burner/4 ovens, we do "family dinner" most Sundays. We can seat 24 at the dining room table but sometimes there are only 6 of us at a smaller table near the kitchen. Always china and crystal, Always nice silver and we always plate the food and serve courses. We always have at least 1 bottle pr person plus bubbly to start and something sweet to finish. We welcome newcomers, and everyone cleans up. When we run out of wine, we open something else. We often serve decanters blind with a code on the bottom.
It is always about the "family of friends" first and foremost. Food and wine a tie for second. We also have a breathalyzer to make sure drivers are safe.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/4/2018 9:28:38 AM

ChrisinCowiche

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I'm of the opinion I like the company, the food, and the wine; usually in that order. While I am a wino who enjoys focused wine tasting, when I gather with friends, I'm usually more there for the social aspect, so stressing about pour size, etc... is not something I do.

FWIW, my experience with CTers, coast to coast is that we are an overly generous group, and there is always enough, more than enough, wine, and if I miss a taste on a particular wine, there are always several other bottles of delicious wine there on the dais looking for a friend. I am that friend.

Yesterday, we had a small group, 5, opened 6-7 bottles I think, and everyone brought bottles we never even opened. Granted not a formal tasting looking for verticals, blind scoring etc..., but when it was all said and done extremely satisfying for my experience.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/4/2018 9:38:17 AM

nmw

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quote:

ORIGINAL: ChrisinSunnyside

I'm of the opinion I like the company, the food, and the wine; usually in that order. While I am a wino who enjoys focused wine tasting, when I gather with friends, I'm usually more there for the social aspect, so stressing about pour size, etc... is not something I do.

FWIW, my experience with CTers, coast to coast is that we are an overly generous group, and there is always enough, more than enough, wine, and if I miss a taste on a particular wine, there are always several other bottles of delicious wine there on the dais looking for a friend. I am that friend.

Yesterday, we had a small group, 5, opened 6-7 bottles I think, and everyone brought bottles we never even opened. Granted not a formal tasting looking for verticals, blind scoring etc..., but when it was all said and done extremely satisfying for my experience.

Amen!

Agree, it’s all about the camaraderie.

FWIW, there was more than enough wine go around. Some of every wine was left and bottles in abundance unopened.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/4/2018 10:37:45 AM

Tannic Monster

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I appreciate all the interesting points of view on this. There is a solution to the 11-12 guest dinner party that no one mentioned that would solve at least part of this particular problem....Magnums.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/4/2018 10:49:00 AM

floydtp

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10-12 is the sweet spot for me. It is a good balance of having enough of each wine for everyone to taste and also having a good variety of wines.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/4/2018 11:43:48 PM

Paul852

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For me it's 6-8. And whilst some of the conversation will be about the wines, more of it will be about other things. This weekend there were 8 of us at a private kitchen (is that a concept that works in the US? An unlicensed restaurant often hidden away in an industrial or commerical building, run by a professional chef (Saturday's has multiple periods in Michelin Star places), BYOB.)

2 of the 8 are not big drinkers. Between us we consumed 10 bottles (2 fizz, 1 white, 6 red, 1 dessert) over 4 hours; there was a second white brought, but it was corked. We're not talking high end wines, but in the US$25-65 retail price range.

We have an excellent public transport system and cheap taxis, so breathalysers are not necessary!

I'm in the process of setting up a Chateau Musar tasting in another private kitchen (whites from 97 and 08; reds from 97, 99, 00, 05, 06; maybe a rosé as well). That will be 6 people and will be a bit more focussed on the wines, but even so, I wouldn't expect them ever to be the majority of the evening's conversation!

< Message edited by Paul852 -- 11/4/2018 11:44:18 PM >

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/5/2018 4:22:48 AM

BornToRhone

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Tannic Monster

I appreciate all the interesting points of view on this. There is a solution to the 11-12 guest dinner party that no one mentioned that would solve at least part of this particular problem....Magnums.

...or two 750ml bottles. This way, instead of 2.5 oz pours of 11 wines, you get a 5 oz pour of 6 wines.

In our groups, some bonus wines also tend to appear. Lastly, focus on the wines you're tasting and not so much about a single wine you may have missed - it makes for a much more relaxed evening.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/5/2018 6:15:59 AM

DoubleD1969

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Most of my wine dinners are with friends. There is a great group in NYC/NJ/CT areas. If the size starts reaching 12 or more, I would suggest to the group to bring a mag or two of the same wines. That is easy to do with the group because most are +1. I prefer to have a nice pour than drinking shots of 1 oz of wine.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/5/2018 8:39:37 AM

wineismylife

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I've done 20 with 1 bottle per many times. Piece of cake.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/5/2018 9:17:59 AM

RedLoverJim

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quote:

ORIGINAL: wineismylife

I've done 20 with 1 bottle per many times. Piece of cake.

Ditto, but then, I've been in WIML's group of twenty more than a few times :-) I generally figure the more the merrier, but different groups are different. I'm in a couple that are typically 15-20, but then I'm in another that is intentionally capped at 8 regulars, in part so we can enjoy more juice each. We host a Christmas party every year that usually has well over 20 wine people. At those types of gatherings, most people are conscious of the fact that smaller pours are warranted, and really while people bring good bottles, they also don't bring bottles that they'll be disappointed to only get a small pour.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/8/2018 5:40:37 PM

wdcwineguys

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We normally do 6-8, 3-4 couples. We have done a few styles of dinner, where everyone brings a course and a corresponding wine. We’ve also done a potluck where everyone brings a part of the meal and two bottles of wine.

Next weekend we’re doing a wine dinner with 6 and we’re going to do a blind tasting.

I prefer the smaller groups. Just my 2 cents.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/9/2018 7:21:09 AM

wineismylife

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Bear in mind I didn't say I prefer large groups. I actually do prefer smaller groups. Met RedLoverJim last night at a local Brazilian restaurant with our Guys Night Out group which has always been limited to a maximum of 8 participates. Had a great time tasting our way through 12-16 wines, almost all from Chile. But larger gatherings can be lots of fun too. Kind of like a party but with serious winos. lol.

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RE: Wine dinners with friends...how many peeps? - 11/10/2018 4:24:30 AM

Hooters

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Personally I would say smaller groups (6-8 maximum!) but I'm a miserable git and don't like large groups preferring decent conversation with a few people rather than superficial chit chat with many. Also can't stand the noise that large groups make but that's the miserable git again

When it comes to the wine, I love dinner with carefully thought out food and wine pairings (including unusual ones that I may not normally try) so would want to work on the basis of each person having 1~2 glasses each and I'd always want to have something in reserve as I've been brought up not to let your guests have an empty glass! Luckily where I live driving home after isn't too difficult to solve as nowhere is more than a few miles away.

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