fingers
Posts: 8242
Joined: 8/26/2006 From: Santa Ana, CA Status: offline
|
Another gem: N.V. Echo Falls Winery Merlot (USA, California) 7/9/2008 50 What vile juice hath satan spat forth here? What sputum erupts from his belly? This is anti-wine. Non-wine. Echo Falls - marketed in the UK to chav women obsessed with getting smashed and stumbling down an English city centre street near you screaming and shouting obscenities at 2am. Marketed to make the proles think they are sophisticated because they are drinking "wine" when in fact they are a glugging down manufactured product - the liquid equivalent of a Big Mac or a Mars Bar. They no doubt try and market this wine is lovingly made to high quality standards by oompah-lumpahs in a Willy-Wonka-like vinyard covered with love and care and delicately poured one bottle at a time out of the vats and hand delivered by rustic farmers to a supermarket near you. Instead it is probably churned out from a Chernobyl-style uber-factory at 60,000 bottles per hour, resembling more a manufactured combination of man-made materials, NASA-created chemicals, sugar, sugar, sugar, sugar, more sugar and some alcohol. And why did I drink this? Because my poor old mum bought me a bottle and insisted on having a glass together and I couldn't say no. I grimaced, drank up and thought of fluffy bunnies to make the pain go away. I feel dirty and ashamed. I could protect the reviewer's identity, but not the wine's!
< Message edited by fingers -- 7/9/2008 8:23:25 AM >
|